Hello everyone!! Back this week with a topic that's debatable by many but relatable by a few. For most people our age, if asked, for whether they would prefer an arranged marriage or a love marriage, majority of the answer comes out as "love marriage" in a jiffy. Had this question been asked probably a 100 years back, answers would have been very different. Back then, there was no concept of love marriage in India. Very few people were lucky enough to experience the same and take it forward. Even in today's world, there are many people who don't even get a say in their marriage decision and just agree for marriage with whoever their families find suitable.
To mention a few of the types of relationships:
1. relationships which start off without any plan and happen to continue for years making you feel very comfortable with that person and ultimately making you decide mutually to spend the rest of your life together. At some point in life, you might sit down and reminisce on the memories of "HOW WE BOTH MET!" which might be a very beautiful story to tell your kids.
2. relationships which start off in a planned manner wherein both people involved have decided mutually that they are going to take this relationship to convert into a marriage. Love clicks in eventually based on each other's likes and dislikes. This mainly happens when both people involved have had multiple failed relationships before this and are also not looking for an arranged marriage.
3. relationships that start out of "love at first sight" and continue like a proper love story, finally leading to marriage. The most ideal form of "LOVE STORY" anyone can ever have.
4. relationships that start after a one night stand is just temporary which is known to both the people involved. Very few instances happen wherein this can turn out into something positive.
5. relationships that start as a rebound is never going to be permanent. If both people are not involved in the rebound knowing the fact that it's a rebound, then this is going to hurt the person who takes this seriously. So, it's always better to clarify things at the start.
6. relationships that start between very close friends who have known each other from years or probably each others' childhood, is a very risky relationship, if both people involved aren't mature enough if/when a break up happens. You'll end up losing a very good friend in your life.
7. relationships that start from online dating websites/ apps can lead anywhere. It can be positive or negative. There are many people, even in today's world, who don't prefer online dating.
7. relationships made by each others' parents as a means of getting both the people married in the future.
The above points are just a few, jotting down everything will probably be a herculean task as relationships can become very complex at any point of time and it can only be understood by the people who are in that position at that point of time.
Choosing between an arranged marriage or a love marriage should solely be the decision of the people who are getting married and not the decision of a third person. A third person is not going to be spending the rest of their lives with the person you're going to marry. You have every right to:
1. get to know the person properly before marriage2. spend as much time with the person possible before marriage
3. get to know their likes and dislikes.
4. match your compatibility to the best possible extent.
Doing the above will entrust yourself with confidence about the person who you're going to marry and you'll be happy about the marriage. I'm not saying arranged marriage is wrong. Both types of marriages have their pros and cons. I'm just saying to think logically and proceed in any relationship.
Many people sacrifice their love for the sake of the happiness of the family and the society, but according to me, that's wrong. You get only one shot in life. Around 35-40% of your life is spent before marriage and the rest 60-65% should be spent with someone you're comfortable with and not a compromise or adjustment. This will surely ruin both the people's life if it's a compromise which might later lead to a divorce as well. Many times, people even compromise on that as well and continue to act happy even though they aren't, just for the sake of "Family and Society". But yeah, we cannot blame anyone for this as this is how it has been going on. We need to ensure that our children are brought up with as much maturity on such thoughts as possible and at the same time they maintain the respect towards the family. As the saying goes:
BE THE CHANGE YOU WISH TO SEE IN THIS WORLD
Let me know your views in comments, if I've mentioned anything right or wrong. This is solely my opinion and it can differ a lot from person to person. The more the positive perspectives, the better future for our next generation.
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